Optimism, Competence, and Call Reluctance: 5 Suggestions

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -- Winston Churchill


Optimism is the belief that things will work out for the best, that we'll generally experience good outcomes in life. I find that most people involved in community benefit work are, at their core, optimists.

I just finished doing some research on procrastination. (Been trying to get around to it for awhile now - ha ha.) Consulted an article from Psychology Today which talks about self-regulation as it relates to an optimistic outlook.

Point is: those who are generally optimistic are deterred less by implementation challenges over which there's a strong amount of personal control.

Stated another way: When the problem is "you," you can better overcome "you" if you are in an optimistic frame of mind.

During my consultation and coaching sessions -- whether one-on-one or in a group -- we always get to the planning of next steps. This generally translates to "Get out from behind my desk and make some visits with donors." And the issue of obstacles almost always arises.

Sometimes -- in anticipation that self-defeating behaviors will arise to block implementation of the plan -- I'll ask the client: "What's your typical defense that seems to defeat your pursuit of goals through procrastination?"

First responses include: my boss throws another urgent priority at me, my co-workers interrupt me, my phone rings.

If I dig deeper, and when the client is in a forthright mood, I'll hear: "I answer my email, check Facebook and Twitter, work on assignments that I enjoy more, chat with others in the office."

So, when led to reflect on it, the otherwise-well-intended staff person admits, at least to self, sometimes to the coach, "I know I said I was going to make this visit. But I just can't get started. I'm worried how it will turn out. Since this stuff is still new to me, I'm not sure I'm very good at it. And so, even though I KNOW I should, I don't complete the task."

That's the odd thing: most people know they are engaging in self-defeating behavior when they're doing it.

Five suggestions when you find yourself in that space:

1. Remind yourself that you are an optimist at heart; that you see the glass as half full, not half empty. (Research shows that optimistic mindsets help overcome implementation challenges.)

2. Break the task into piece-parts. "Make a visit" can become "call to arrange a time," "prepare for the visit," "go on the visit itself," and "follow-up on the visit." Then, rather than procrastinate on the whole, re-frame the task so that your accountability is to do just the first step.

3. Change how you state your implementation intention on your To Do list. Instead of "Call Mrs. Jones to arrange a time to visit," write "Do not check email until I've called Mrs. Jones."

4. Remember that practice is required before you'll feel more competent. In the meantime, write an affirmation about your competence at this task: "I am getting better and better at making donor visits. I already know WHAT to do, and can do WHAT IT TAKES to be successful. I love my time spent one-on-one with donors. I have every reason to believe I can effectively interact with our donor, who is, after all, a friend of our organization. I can expect this to go well."

5. Ahead of time, plan your response to the emotional anxiety that you know you'll encounter sometime during the task. "When I begin to feel overwhelmed, which I expect to feel just as I'm picking up the phone, I will simply take it one step at a time and keep my focus on the very first step of getting started."

Many of us are self-reflective and self-examining enough to be able to predict with some accuracy what avoidance techniques we'll use to postpone a task we don't feel comfortable with. Knowing this, it becomes a matter of building our own personal plan of attack in anticipation of the obstacles (rather than wait for them to arise).

Now, stop reading this blog and go do what you've been procrastinating about!